I love nothing more than the value I receive as a parent, by simply having a conversation with my kids. It may be a deep and meaningful discussion around a story that has hit news headlines … or chatting about what happened at school or work that day, it might be sharing a series of jokes (some funny, some not so) … or providing answers to some tough emotional questions.
We often have these sorts of discussions at the dinner table, whilst sharing our evening meal, but last week we were following a car (funnily enough, on our way out to dinner!) and we all noticed the rear window decal on the vehicle in front at the same time. It read:
Respect All ~ Fear None
It was one of those slogans which prompt you to ask the right question and open some sensational dialogue with your kids; in fact I really wish I had the foresight to have recorded our discussion so I could relay it word for word. Instead I asked the kids again today, what Respect all ~ Fear None means to them and the following is word for word, from the mouths of my 8 and 10 year old.
We should respect everyone no matter who they are or what they look like or what they do and we should treat everyone the same. We don’t need to be scared either …
It’s very true and I try to do this in how I live my life …
I think my family really does that to me, they respect me and my sister and I respect them and we don’t fear each other …
I think that I definitely try to respect all people and it’s not just people its everything – property, animals … everything and fear none; don’t shy away from things because you are scared or afraid ~ you have nothing to lose. Don’t be afraid of bullies and don’t be afraid of anyone that might try to control you … live your life like that – respect all and fear none.
Then we got into the deeper layers of what happens when you lose respect for someone and what that means, how that looks … how we cope with that loss and how we carry on, still respecting all …
My son shared by giving an example of a boy at school who had bullied him, as a family we had discussed what Jackson was going to do about it when it was happening and came up with a walk away solution.
I lost respect for Paul* – coz he bullied me but now whenever he comes to say something I just walk away coz I know he’s going to get me into more trouble. That shows I don’t fear Paul – I respect myself by walking away.
My daughter’s perspective …
If I do lose respect for someone … well it depends on who they are and what they did but after a while if I can tell they are genuinely sorry and they can regain my trust that is ok but if not, how can I respect them? It’s easier said than done, actions speak louder than words.
(Yes … she is one wise 10 year old!)
We all shared our thoughts in a genuine and heart-felt way but it was the wisdom and depth of understanding that came from the mouths of my children that made my heart sing and feel incredibly proud of them as individuals.
I love our random chats … and after this one, as an added bonus … we have ourselves a new family motto!
Macca ~ June 23rd, 2015
*Name changed for privacy and respect!